After sharing my paper with my peers I was pleased to see that they thought I had done a good job. I looked at their suggestions and went back and double checked my paper. I made corrections where they suggested. It was great to have their feedback, especially since I had been staring at it all week. It was nice to have outside sources point things out that were blending together for me. I am grateful that I had such a great group to work with.
Picture form Jonny Hughes Back2Life Blog |
From Jon:
Hey Daniela!
I really liked your introduction. You gave a great description of 21st century learners and you also have excellent thoughts here about student motivation. One thing though that I felt was missing was there could have been a little bit more of a connection to the title of your article, "Blogging Into Math". In the introduction, it really doesn't mention math or blogging. This might be what you intended, but it was just a thought that I had while reading it.
Your lit review section is very thorough. I think your organization of this part of the article is very strong.
I don't know if it would be allowed or not for the publication that you are submitting this to, but a chart might add a lot to your methodology section if it is possible.
Your conclusion is solid, but maybe you could have a different final sentence referring back to your main topic that would tie everything together a bit more.
Also, I know we are all in a time crunch, but if you can find a few extra minutes today it might be good to reread your article and look for some grammar errors. I noticed there was one in your very first sentence, and I think there were just a couple others later on.
I hope some of this feedback helps! You have a very good article here. Good luck with everything!
Jon
Picture from Alicia Welch Planting Seeds Blog |
From Alicia:
hey...
not all of the fonts are the same size and I think it might need to be in Times New Roman
the beginning paragraph is a little difficult to understand
and the methodology section should probably be rewritten in the past tense
overall..I think it looks good
thanks for sharing
Wk 4 Publishing_Presenting_Project